Monday, March 26, 2007 | 7:13 AM

Random

A Ring....

Is a circle, a hoop that never ends

Is a straight line with both ends stuck together so you dont know when's the start and when's the end

Is something you wear on your fingers

Is a symbol of promise.....

What does a ring means?

The other day I was out...cant remember was it yesterday or the day before....I saw something that made me feel touched and sad and emotional at the same time....when i was going down the escalator, i saw/hear this old grandpa asking his wife if her legs are acting up cas it was raining heavily at that point of time....the next thing i knew he was holding her up and supporting her while she walk....that tiny old man looks like he going to splinter at any blow yet he was trying his best to support his other half...i just thought that was so so sweet....to be able to be together and stay together for such a long time is not easy, much less than still be so loving after all these years....call me a ninny but i feel like tearing when i saw how affectionate they are and that made me wonder about alot of things......i wonder if many years down the road, will there be any youngster be looking at me and feeling envious and emo the same way i felt when i saw that old couple?

Once upon a time, a boy promised the ger that till the day she grew old and grey and haggard, he will still be the one holding on to her hand while they stroll...yet, along the way there wasnt any inclination that he will fulfill his promise because he barely held her hand for long, not even long enuff to notice changes on her hands.....

Friday, March 23, 2007 | 7:30 AM

Moody

Just came back from the warehouse sale...some stuff there is really super duper cheap...and its good stuff, not old stocks...as usual, after the setup yesterday, everyone started reserving all the hot picks so by the time it was open to public today alot was already gone...burnt a hole in my pocket too...how can anyone resist a cheap buy? *Gur eyeshadow at $5 each...YSL mask at $30 for a box of 6 when usual price is $120...obviously all of us pick stuff with upmost care since internally we know which are good buys and what stuff are ageing stocks.

The other day Zep met with an accident cas a stupid cabby serve to pick up passengers without signalling...was shocked cas ntg concrete was known since roy cant give a proper account of what was going on....was confused too cas he can actually tok to me over the fone and yet he sounds in pain so i din have an idea how bad was it...anyway heng derrick was in office so we both took halfday and rush down together...both freaked out cas of the unknown...so we spent the day at TTSH waiting...at least i was lucky cas i was the only one who could go into the A&E area...oh, i saw close ups of his bloodied toe and was pretty fascinated by it cas a bit of the flesh was gone and the skin around the area was all crumpled up and dark blood clots were forming too...well... at least he was one of the lucky ones...not too terribly injured even though broken a bit of bones...he just beta dont ever ride bike again if not a certain someone will SKIN him alive, break him into little pieces and feed snakes...

Someone ask me the other day about hows my r/s with the SO and if he stands a chance to come after me...then he mentioned something which has already been mentioned in the past quite sometime ago....brought up those questions that I cant answered a year ago...that time he asked why am i still holding on to someone i love but who aint loving me right or communicating with me and why cant i let go and go for him since he is someone who will treat and love me in a much beta way? Dodo always tell me the same thing too...that its beta to be loved and treated well by someone than to have it the other way around and always be the one giving in. Cas in every r/s, someone always love the other more than the other love him/her. Selfish thinking, but there is still some element of truth in it...its a defense mechanism for people who are afraid of getting hurt...yet, how is one suppose to be truely happy?

Anyway, at this point of time i in totally moody mode due to some incident...not blaming anyone or whatever, i just cant help but keep brooding over it since there are always constant reminder and its just.....just feels damn weird....probably i need to burry myself in work so that i will be distracted and not think about it and maybe it will tire me out so i wont have the energy to brood also...

The road once trot upon seems quiet and dark, yet the path in front is filled with haziness...face to make choices at the junction, which route shall thou take?

Friday, March 16, 2007 | 10:50 PM

Cleo Event

Went for the Cleo event last night....the only word i can use to describe the whole thing is 'himbotic'.....its a totally senseless showcase full of guys who only look super good in the magazines all thanks to photoshop....when u see the real thing muz seriously discount quite a fair bit....i guess the wonders of makeup and photoshop applys to guys too...the whole event wasnt like a competition or anything...dont even know how they actually pick the winner since there wasnt any real criteria for them to compete....they only need to show face, play some stupid games with the screaming gers and the whole 'competition' was over in slightly more than an hour...the only time me, lene and irene went mad was when they started doing the strip tease dance...wooh~~ i love 6 packs! those abs!!!totally yummy!and the way one of the guys dance was cute!! he jiggle his ass till the floor was screaming their guts out...we 3 gers were telling the organiser next year muz make them strip to their boxers! haha

Anyway the whole PR thingy at this kinda event was fun! its my first time being a VIP cas my perfume is sponsoring the event. The food was yummy and free flow of champanges and other drinks plus you kinda get royal treatment. Its interesting to meet the people from cleo in flesh since all i ever noe about the whole lot of them was by reading cleo...oh they brought the guys around to meet the VIPs also but I just feel like the guys were quite fake...still its fun to PR around and have fun....now i shall cross my fingers and hope the sentosa event will be fun too!

Friday, March 9, 2007 | 8:52 PM

Bening Appreaciated

I gave someone a lil surprise after work cas i thot that will bring some cheer to that person...it wasnt some big-hoo-ha-party kinda surprise, just a small gesture of simply bringing some food and drinks and did 'work visiting'. It wasnt something i haven done before since im the kind who will 'work visit' frens if im very free but yet its different this time. it made me ponder about if i do the same thing to a certain someone, that person will propably be not very happy because i'll be in the way and affecting whatever job that person is doing or my coming down is a hassle....i do agree that its best to draw lines at work esp if 2 people are too close but i dont feel that small gestures like that will affect alot..it just hit me alot this time around cas its like : hey someone actually appreaciates my efforts in coming down even though i was worn out....its just soooo different in a good way....suddenly feel that what someone told me was quite true....sometimes love alone juz aint enough....

Saturday, March 3, 2007 | 10:34 PM

NIL

I woke up feeling terrible, not only because i slpt at 630 earlier on or because of my bad throat or fever or swollen eyes or because i haven do my paperwork.....but because of the words that was exchanged earlier on.....it sux and hurts to know how much one can hurt others when the person is suppose to be someone close to you....i feel like a big fat bloody bitch cas im the cause of everything bad.....probably all these is happening due to my own selfishness, probably i should have waited and let myself settle everything first, collect my feelings and thought and emotions before embarking on a new course of action instead of dragging people along with me into my shit....i dont know how long i need to so call collect back and sort out everything before im finally ready, im so confused at this point of time now that i dont even know what i want or what i want to do....i feel very weigh down, very burdened by alot of things esp work....i feel myself suffocating, i feel like i dont have a quiet private time for me to recuprate and breathe..... everything i do, everywhere i go im rushing and rushing and rushing....like now, i can see 2 big paperbags bursting with paperwork and yet i cant make myself go attack them cas im feeling damn affected now....not blaming anyone but sometimes i wonder why izzit so coincident that such incidents always happen when i have a terrible workload to handle...the last time this happened i ended up doing roster till 6am and it turns out to be full of shitty mistakes which till now i haven rectify all of it....whats wrong with me? i just feel like i cant do anything right and why do i always contridict myself? sometimes i wish i can smack myself to wake up my idea, like i cant figure out why am i so stubborn and keep harping on the same few issues and not let them go till i spend time pondering over them?am i too stubborn for my own good? one day....all it needs and take is one fine day for me to crack and break into pieces.....

i was utterly stun when he can mention extracts of my blog perfectly well when sometimes i cant even rem what i wrote

my blog is my own personal space to pen my thought and help me think through stuff better...its soley for myself, it dosent exist for anyone else and its my habit to not mention names on issues that are impt to me so dont come and take my blog as a platform for recognition....just because i mention or dont mention about you dosent mean i dont recognise you or your efforts....if anyone is in a position to comment on you efforts it will definatley be me cas i know the most....